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栋梁 · 江门丨林徽因致费慰梅信（1936年5月7日）

2022-12-15 14:52

来源：澎湃新闻·澎湃号·湃客

原创栋梁 · 江门建筑史学刊收录于合集 #栋梁 · 江门 2个

编者按：

“栋梁——一代建筑宗师梁思成学术文献展”由清华大学建筑学院、江门市人民政府主办，中国营造学社纪念馆、江门市文化广电旅游体育局承办，历时七个月精心筹划，计划于2022年12月23日在广东省江门市中国侨都华侨华人博物馆正式开幕，预计将展至2023年6月30日。

2022年适逢梁思成先生（1901—1972）逝世五十周年，2023年又是其父梁启超先生（1873—1929）诞辰一百五十周年。梁思成先生祖籍广东新会（今属江门市），能够在先生的故乡，对这位中国建筑一代宗师的学术人生进行全面回顾，具有十分特殊的纪念意义。本次展览也是“栋梁”展继2021年8月至2022年5月在清华大学艺术博物馆成功举办之后的第一站巡回展。

本次展览的主题之一，是期望通过尽可能丰富、详实的学术文献，较为全面地呈现梁思成在建筑学众多领域的斐然成就，回顾与反思其精彩、卓越而又令人感慨的学术生涯，更加立体地呈现一代宗师的品格与精神特质。此外，由于是在先生的家乡办展，展览的另一主题则是希望呈现梁思成所受的家庭教育对其一生成就的重要影响，展览将通过一系列极其珍贵的家庭影像、书信等文物（有许多未曾在清华“栋梁”展展出过，甚至是第一次对外展出），从多角度展现梁氏家族这个中国近现代历史上人才辈出，并对中国文化做出巨大贡献的杰出家庭——这也是展览标题“栋梁”的一个重要寓意：梁氏一族出了多位国之栋梁。

最近《建筑史学刊》公众号将陆续刊登一系列即将在江门“栋梁”展展出的书信、老照片等珍贵史料，以飨读者。这些书信、老照片大多由梁思成亲属提供，特此表示衷心感谢！

林徽因画了一张当时梁宅——即北京北总布胡同3号的平面图，名曰《床铺图》，注明每间屋子什么人住，放了几张床（图中方向为上南下北）。下面林徽因写道：“答案：当一个‘老爷’娶了一个‘太太’，他们要提供17张床和17套铺盖，还要让黄包车夫睡在别人家，不然他只能在院子里站着。”

当年除梁、林、两个子女和林老太太外，还有五六位亲威朋友常住梁家，信中所说早饭、喝茶等等就是指他们。当时梁家共有包括厨师和黄包车夫在内的六个佣人。

图中北耳房是厕所，林徽因注：“自用；浴室；厕所和更衣室；书房；办公室；起居室（非常高兴我总算有一间属于自己的房间！）”

图中梁、林的卧室注：“1个老爷；1个太太。亚地斯亚贝巴，意大利军队正在逼进。”1936年5月，墨索里尼统治下的意大利法西斯军队正在入侵阿比西尼亚（今埃塞俄比亚），兵临其首都亚地斯亚贝巴城下。

慰梅，慰梅，慰梅

（信封上我得写给费正清，因为这对于白莉奥来说更合适些）

自从收到你上封让人高兴的信以来，我一直情绪高涨，现在又来了一封，我必须马上回你。很长时间我没有（或不能）给你们写信，因为这中间有个“时间差”，那是因为你们的信不是经西伯利亚邮来的，以致一封信要走五十天（只有后来的一封稍为快一点）。所以好些事弄得让人非常扫兴。我们特别喜欢那些关于各种各样事情的“打字报告”，只是感情上还有点不够满足。

看来你对我的生活方式——到处为他人作嫁，操很多的心而又缺乏锻炼等等——很担心。是啊，有时是一事无成，我必须为一些不相干的小事操劳和浪费时间，直到——我的意思是说，除非命运对我发慈悲而有所改变。看来命运对于作为个人的菲丽丝①不是很好，但是对于同一个人，就其作为一名家庭成员而言的各个方面来说，还相当不错。天气好极了，每间屋子都重新裱糊过、重新布置并装修过了，以期日子会过得更像样些。让我给你画张图，告诉你是怎么回事。

慰梅，慰梅，我给你写什么新闻还有什么用——就看看那些床吧！它们不叫人吃惊吗！！！！可笑的是，当它们多多少少按标出的公用地点摆放到一起之后，他们会一个接一个地要吃早点，还要求按不同的样式在她的或他的房间里喝茶！！！下次你到北京来，请预订梁氏招待所！

我要开始另一页了。

此刻孩子们从学校回来了，他们非要看这张“床铺图”，还要认出他们自己的床等等、等等。宝宝总是挑剔她的衣服，因为天气已经热了。海伦的衬衫已经有点过时。从诫从道丽的绿衣服里得到一条短灯笼裤，很帅。

不，不，不，我不能让你认为我已陷入了家务琐事之中——我想，当“joie de vivre”②

占据了我的身心时，我还有别的方面。虽然这种情况不多，但还是有的！

是的，我当然懂得你对工作的态度。我也是以这种态度工作的，虽然有时候和你很不一样。当那是“joie de vivre 的纯粹产物”时，我的成绩也最好。最认真的成绩是那些发自内心的快乐或悲伤的产物，是当我发现或知道了什么，或我学会了去理解什么而急切地要求表达出来，严肃而真诚地要求与别人共享这点秘密的时候的产物。对于我来说，“读者”并不是“公众”，而是一些比我周围的亲戚朋友更能理解和同情我的个人，他们急于要听我所要说的，并因我之所说的而变得更为悲伤或更欢乐。当我在做那些家务琐事的时候，总是觉得很悲哀，因为我冷落了某个地方某些我虽不认识，对于我却更有意义和重要的人们。这样我总是匆匆干完手头的活，以便回去同别人“谈话”，并常常因为手上的活老干不完，或老是不断增加而变得很不耐烦。这样我就总是不善于家务，因为我总是心不在焉，心里诅咒手头的活（尽管我也可以从中取乐并且干得非常出色）。另一方面，如果我真的在写作或做类似的事，而同时意识到我正在忽视自己的家，便一点也不感到内疚，事实上我会觉得快乐和明智，因为做了更值得做的事——只有在我的孩子看来生了病或体重减轻时我才会感到不安，半夜醒来会想我这么做究竟是对还是不对。

我的英文越来越糟糕和荒疏。我要停笔了，等到下一次“joie de vivre ”降临和我的英文真的利落一点的时候再写。

宝宝给你写了无数的信，现在寄给你一封。

告诉费正清，我的文章老也写不成，上帝才知道为什么我还在想完成它。先别生我的气，为我祈祷吧。

爱你、爱你、爱你

菲丽丝

36年5月7日

你们俩要多写中文，只要你们提出要求，我们都会帮助的。

注：

① Phyllis 林徽因英文名。

② “生活的欢乐”原文为法文。——原译注

May 7th ' 36

Wilma, Wilma, Wilma

（I have to address the envelope to John

because it is more proper for Balliot）

I have been in the yelling mood ever since your last delightful letter, now that another one has come I must answer you right away. There has been a long time I didn' t（or couldn' t）write to you people because of a 'gap' caused by your sending letters not via Siberia and each took over fifty days to come. （except one which came a little sooner but it must be one that was written later.）So everything got terribly upsetting. We loved the“type-written reports”of where about and what-abouts, but emotionally they are a bit unsatisfactory.

You sound worried about my ways of life；running around helping people in general, lots of worry and no exercise etc. Well,sometimes nothing can be done, it is almost fatal I should slave and waste myself on trash always, till—I mean unless circumstance itself take mercy on me and change. So far the circumstance is none too good for Phyllis the individual, though very smooth for the same person in all the capacities as a family member. The weather is glorious everybody has room re-papered, re-furnished, decorated to re-assume life in better shape. Let me give you a picture to show how it is.

Wilma, Wilma, is there any use my going on writing news…… just look at the beds！Aren't they exciting！！！！But the fun is when they are more or less gather in the marked public spots and when they have breakfast one after another, and tea each in his or her room in different styles！！！Next time you come to Peking, ask for the Liangs boarding house！

I will start another sheet.

At this point of course the children came back from school insisted on looking at the "picture of beds" and identify their own etc etc. Bao-bao is always fussing about her dresses because the weather is getting warm. Helen's shirt is a bit“out”now. Chung-Chieh has the end of Dolly's green dress for a pair of short knickers, very smart.

No, no, no, I refuse to give you more impression how thoroughly I am buried in domesticity——I still have other points left I think, when“joie de vivre" takes over me which though come seldom, it still comes！

Yes, I do understand your approach to work. I work in very much the same way, though sometimes quite different. I achieve best when it is“pure product of joie de vivre”. Most seriously when it is a question of bursting from inside, happily or unhappily. When it is a question of desperate yearning for expression——something I found out or I know, or I learned to understand, and I wanted to impart the secret seriously and earnestly to some one . 'Readers' are not 'public' to me, but individuals who are more understanding and sympathetic than relatives and friends surrounding me and who are eager to listen to what I have to say and become saddened or gladdened because of what I say. When I am doing domestic little trifles, I always feel that it is a pity I am neglecting some one else infinitely more interesting and important somewhere else unknown to me. Thus I hasten to finish the work in hand in order to go back“talking”to the others, and get often irritated if the work I have in hand never finishes, or coming in fresh bunches and increases all the time. Thus I am never good at domestic work, because half of my mind is elsewhere and cursing the work I was doing ( tho I may even enjoy the work or doing it terribly well.) On the other hand if I am doing a real piece of writing or something like that and realize at the same time I was neglecting my home, my conscience never got pricked at all, in fact I feel happy and wise that I have been doing something much more worthwhile—it is only when my children looking ill or losing weight that I start feeling bad and wake up at middle of the night wondering I have been fair or not.

My English is getting very poor and rusty. I will stop here and write again when 'joie de vivre' takes over me and even my English pushes forth in real neat way.

Bao bao has written you countless letters I am sending you this one.

Tell John, my article somehow never come to anything, and only Gods know why I still hope to finish it. Don' t get disgusted yet. Pray for me.

Love and love and love

Phyllis

You must both write more Chinese. We will help, any way you suggest.